Alleviating Halloween BOO HOO HOOs
For Non-verbal Children with Autism
So, Halloween is just days away, such fun, excitement, and playfulness. Oh! the decorations, costumes, joyful expressions of laughter, screams, and scary noises. The ritual cheers of “TRICK-OR-TREAT!” echo throughout neighborhoods, community events, and parties. And, all the treats! Such yummy and tempting treats!
To delight in the night of fright brings a little chaos to ALL families, but in the end is worth the once a year experience. Yes, ALL families suffer a bit of chaos on Halloween with managing of costumes, flashlights, treat bags, traversing the streets or community events in the dark and encouraging the children to remember to say, “trick-or-treat” and “thank you.” Families try to safely handle the unpredictable and occasionally unsettling moments that arise then get home with maybe just a dirty or torn costume, lost flashlight, broken treat containers, dropped candy, missing shoe and a good dose of fatigue.
I don’t have to tell parents of children with autism how much more difficult it can be for them. Between the unpredictability, sensory distresses, confusion, and lack of vocabulary, children with Autism, especially those who are non-verbal, often fall into complete collapse during the “Festivities.” And yet, for the sake of tradition, the siblings, enduring hope, and the few moments of joy that are experienced, families with autistic children charge head-on into the events. Braving the Halloween Boo Hoo Hoo’s these families embark on the journey, carve out a few good moments, breath through the melt downs, fight to stay positive, then return home frazzled and completely exhausted.
How can the family of a non-verbal child with autism increase the child’s opportunities to participate in the festivities and reduce those boo-hoo-hoo moments?
You have already bought or made a costume that does not irritate your child’s sensitivity to touch or smell. You have provided noise reducing ear protectors and incorporated them into the theme of the costume. You have made sure to include at least one emotionally soothing item in your bag. Now how to handle communication?
Communication hmm…. that is a tricky one. Bringing picture books is cumbersome, will take extra time to create the appropriate pictures for the night, and will be at risk of being lost or broken. If you have a cool communication device sent by school, that’s an option. But, is it truly an option? Not only is it one more thing to manage but can you afford – practically, educationally, emotionally, or financially – to have it lost or broken for a few hours of “fun?”
So, do you just go without any communication supports? You know your child and can tell when they need something even if it takes a frustrating game of 20 questions to get to what it is he or she wants. And, the siblings can help yell “trick-or-treat” while you repeatedly indicate to strangers that speech is not a strength of your little one dressed in the ***** Costume. Yes, that is what you have done before and it will have to be enough this time too. Right?
Maybe Not. Maybe you can try another option. I think you likely have a handy communication support that will both help your child to say “trick-or-treat” on their own, and encourage your child’s self-advocacy through structured choice. This item is already coming along with you and is pre-equipped with the necessary tools. What is this little piece of magic? It’s your cell phone.
The following suggestions are simple and have helped me in the past to quickly, with little effort support children with autism to join-in on the celebrations. Using your phones photo functions, you can quickly and easily provide the supports needed for the event.
- Make pre-recorded video clips of your child in their costume while others yell out Trick-or-Treat. The child can then easily replay this video when appropriate, calling out the time-honored phrase right along with his/her siblings and peers.
- “Thank You” can also be recorded. Politeness goes a long way in developing good social integration.
- Take pictures of different items that may be important to your child to aide in communicating what they want or need. Keep these pictures in a separate album to make them easy for you to group and present to the child upon engagement.
- Take in-the-moment pictures. Sometimes there are choices in the particular celebratory environment you could not have predicted. No problem. Simply offer them up in real life or take pictures of them and let your child touch the picture he/she wants.
- Download a free collage app to organize your pictures into simple 2-4 structured choice groups. This makes it quick and easy to communicate items by category. It also allows the adults to place limits on the choices offered. For example, you may offer juice or water without allowing for sodas or punch to drink.
- Use a collage app with video enabled segments to place the expressive videos on one easy access page.
- Remember to include pictures of the choices not to participate and ask for help. If one house is too scary can the child choose to approach the porch or stay with the adult? Can the child choose to keep walking, take a break, or go to the car? Can the child choose to keep wearing their mask/hat or put it in the bag? Is there a choice to carry their treat bag or leave it with mom/dad?
Remember, when supporting communication and emotional regulation, as discussed in my book Choice and Structure for Children with Autism: Getting through the Long Days of Quarantine, it is important to provide Structured Choices. Leading with Structured Choice not only provides the child with an opportunity to communicate their needs, it gifts them the opportunity to engage their personal power in an appropriate cooperative way. This reduces the child’s need to resort to demanding some control through crying and tantrum behavior. Structured choice can alleviate those Halloween Boo Hoo Hoos.
